I feel like i'd be that person who gets a bloody nose while talking to their crush, and then sneeze right in their face getting blood all over them. I mean, I don't get bloody noses, but that totally sounds like me. For those also plagued with HORRIBLE DEADLY AWKWARD here's some worst case ever crush situations;
accidentally stabbing them with a pencil
tripping and face planting right on their groin
using their phone and accidentally clicking an ad for breast enlarging pills seemingly on purpose right in front of them
accidentally saying something offensive because of sneeze/stutter/distraction "i'm jewish"
"man, I hate jews."
blink
looks at juice box "JUICE I HATE JUICE"
OR MY PERSONAL FAVE
"arg I really hate starbucks lines..."
"yeah, I super wish these people would all drown in the expensive coffee they worship."
he pulls out starbucks gold card
news anchor discusses flood at coffee field, killing thousands of workers
he discusses interest in girls who are graceful
"oh yeah, well I took ballet for like four years"
your feet right then decide to sink into a hole in the ground and propel you forward into a muddy pile of what can only be manure
This is why being yourself is good. If no one expects you not to get your hair caught in a lamp, you can only EXCEED EXPECTATIONS!
Stay thirsty my friends.
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