Religion according to two year old Belle

When I was little I didn't really get religion.  I didn't understand that there were different beliefs and so what resulted was this mashed up story in my head that I would blurt out at weird times. Today, I am releasing part one:

The cavemen were all killed in an ice age, and only two survived.  Adam and eve repopulated the earth.

Yup.  When I actually figured out the whole evolution vs creationism thing, it just resulted in more confusion.


A little while later, Mary gave birth to Jesus, who while out walking one day, followed a trail of burning bushes through the desert for 40 days.  They led him to the top of a hill where God gave him ten self published copies of the Bible.

After being told, "no Belle, that's definitely not it" I continued to delve deeper into my mish-mashed religious views

Noah did not steer the boat to the promised land, and it definitely didn't contain all the extinct animals.  That's not why they went away, it's not because we haven't found them.  

That pretty much sums up what i've remembered for now.